Happy Birthday to me :)

Make a wish, Patwari!

Mumbai, ahoy!

Sunday, Evening 8:00 PM – Cribbing to Thatha (my roomie) about how I have wasted the entire weekend by doing nothing but sleeping and hunting for a decent place to eat (i.e. a place where you get cheap yet great food!) and couldn’t really do the Mumbai-darshan that I have been planning to do ever since I landed here. Thatha takes his eyes away from his laptop (he is watching some Tam movie for the umpteenth time – don’t ask me why! Tams usually don’t have any reasons for doing what they do), murmurs something and gets back to his chore.

Night 11:00 PM – Playing War-craft on the laptop and promising to myself that this is the last game…

Night 11:59 PM – Take a Digene tablet (the oily food has caused acidity again!), check the alarm, and hit the bed.

Monday, Morning 7:30 AM - Shit! Am late again. Get up, check the alarm (it must have rung you idiot!), rush to the bathroom… have to get ready by 8 at all costs. Today, I finally want to attend that early morning briefing on the treasury floor…

Morning 8:05 AM - Enter the mess, check the menu, if it’s anything other than Misal Pav, order (and eat breakfast in 2 minutes flat) else rush to the station.

Morning 8:11 AM – Enter the station missing the 8:10 Andheri local by a few seconds again! The Bandra local is at 8:25 – so all hopes of attending the briefing down the drain!

Morning 8:35 AM – Getting a free full-body massage – in the local train – it is packed to the fullest and you can’t move a toe without pushing someone off the moving train.

Morning 9:00 AM – Waiting in the queue to board the bus that takes you to BKC, and making use of the time to breathe freely for a change and also to wipe the perspiration…

Morning 9:25 AM – I am again the last intern to enter the office and I re-assure myself that petty things such as this don’t affect my chances of getting a PPO

Morning 9:35 AM – Try and talk to the guide, she is busy (We’ll talk over lunch, dear), try and do some work (after successfully resisting the temptation to participate in the nonsensical chat the other interns are having), discard the idea as bad and join the gossip instead.

Afternoon 1:00 PM – Guide finally steals half an hour from her busy schedule and we meet over lunch in the cafeteria… this being the only thing in the whole day that I can feel happy about…;)

Evening 5:30 PM - All the interns go down for snacks and they need some bakra for time-pass as they are bored. But they don’t seem to get bored with me being the bakra everyday!

Evening 7:30 PM – After another day in office, you rise to leave and realize that you would be the first intern to leave. You again assure yourself that this would not affect your chances of a PPO and walk out of the office. (This occasionally doesn’t happen if guide wants to talk to you or you are doing some good work for a change - and then you may have to stay back till 9:00 – 9:30)

Evening 8:15 PM – Get a free full-body massage again!

Evening 8:50 PM – Enter the hostel, change into full pajamas and remind Thatha to do the same (In the hostel, we aren’t allowed to go to the ground floor wearing anything that shows even an inch of our body except the face. BTW, we are in a boys-only hostel and the authorities have no problems with the boarders loitering in the corridors in ill-fitting underwear almost all the time!), go down to the mess, eat dinner if anything is left at all…

Evening 9:15 PM – Check if the wireless is working, curse since it is not, crib about how long it has been since you checked your mail or did orkutting, and then start with War-craft…

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Spend most of your next weekend (if you don’t go to office on Saturday that is) washing your clothes, ironing them (if the dhobi has ditched you again!), chatting with other B-school students, planning to go on Mumbai-darshan, falling asleep in the afternoon… doing nothing and just nothing…

That has been Mumbai for me for the past one month… the coming days have something good to look forward to like the faccha party, the Alumni meet… and the project work-load will also go up keeping me busier…. So taking a sanyaas from blogging for a while!

May God kill Arjun Singh soon! :)

Life@IIMB Part-V

A five-day farce!

Things are getting scarier. There was light at the end of the tunnel, or so I thought. Now there is this nagging feeling that it was only a mirage.

You know that creepy feeling that something somewhere is terribly wrong and you ought to know about it, fix it if possible… as it concerns you and the ones you care for… but you don’t know what to do and where to look…

Final Placements of seniors are on now while I write this blog… was there most of the time… and was witness to the drama that is being played out in the MDC lawns… The newspapers will be agog for news of splendid placements and would carry articles that would eulogize the institutes and the MBA program in general. And all the budding MBA-aspirants beyond the walls that surround us here would embark on a journey… a journey fuelled by fragile dreams and delicate aspirations… a vicious trajectory would start all over again.

The placement process at the MBA institutes is a painful one. One would marvel at the way the entire mela is organized and at the sheer scale of it. One would also marvel at how only a few gain out of the process and most are left stranded trying to figure out what could have possibly gone wrong. Having been through a similar process during my summer placements, I thought I would be able to help them out, understand what they are going through. But, I realized that I am still not strong enough… that the vagaries of the process were more than I could take. Looking at people in pain is not easy… and not if a similar pain resides somewhere in your heart too.

One thing which strikes you immediately at the end of the first day of the placement process is that none of the people who are still waiting to get placed deserve to be put through this agonizing process. They are some of the finest brains in India and they don’t need any certificate to prove that they are good. And if nothing else, just the fact that they have the strength to be through all of this is good enough evidence of their capabilities, for me at least. It is not easy to hide from the world the excruciating agony that burns inside. But they don’t need anyone’s sympathy because, if anything, that will only break them down… it is indifference that makes them stronger, helps them to go through it.

Almost like a spider that carefully builds a cob-web for its unsuspecting prey, the MBA institutes ride on the glory of the Day Zero placements. That ensures many things – glamour and exclusivity being two of them. There is no denying that there is no dearth of opportunities for a graduate from a reputed B-School, even for a Day One or a Day Two candidate, and in the end, it all boils down to the abilities that you have. But what is surprising is the way the downsides of the process are played down… and what is highlighted in media is only what would add fuel to the fire.

While a sweeping sense of deja-vu engulfed me the entire time that I was there, I could almost see a similar thing happening to me one year down the line and I kind of feel I don’t give a damn. It is good that I have accepted it now. But does that mean that it wouldn’t hurt when that happened, or that I would stop aiming for the best? Probably not… but then that’s life. Isn’t it?

Yeh ILU-ILU kya hai?

Should have posted this on Valentine's Day... but nevertheless!

Love.... it's something I have contemplated a lot about... something that has been the subject of a lot of discussion among friends.. something which I neither claim to understand nor believe in...

Now, I am talking about a very special variety of love. Love, sadly, is a term used with a lot of liberty and may have many different (and some shady) meanings in different contexts. The pure and quintessential love that we have toward our parents, siblings, family.. friends.. is not something which I will brood over here. Love, in this blog, has a romantic flavour.. it's about that 'itch'...

I begin by wondering. I always do. Why don’t I have a girlfriend while everyone else has at least one? I think I know the reason. Though I’ve a particularly well-crafted face (which I know because of my rather long observations before the mirror and for the fact that I’ve discreetly noticed ‘those who matter’ looking back at me), I don’t have that air of exquisite charm around me which sends gals rolling at your feet.
Never mind.

Next I elaborate on the importance of falling in love -

(between you and me, having a girlfriend and falling in love are two very separate, mostly mutually exclusive events... I will contemplate more on the former as that is what is thought, wrongly as you might have guessed, to be the most common symptom of falling in love)

First, you start getting this special treatment from all your friends. They stop taking you for granted as they know that, now, someone else has snatched away that privilege from them.

Second, all the other girls start noticing you too. It's as if you have proved your manhood without even winking an eye. They, apparently, think that when this girl is going out with that guy, that guy has to have something to him. Personally, I think that this is the only merit of falling in love.


Next, your daily routine changes like a miracle. You no longer are that stink-bag that can also walk. You keep your room and more importantly yourself clean and are given the privilege of being an escort to your girlfriend wherever she goes. This also has another incentive attached. This shows the world that you are also 'sensitive', the perfect metrosexual attribute... that is you are so deeply in love that you can't possibly walk without your girl..

Last but not the least, you also realize that this is not love after all...

My regards to all the lovers in IIMB and also the world that claims to exist outside...

~Down Memory lane~

Some moments from the past that I cherish... some snaps from the years gone by...

Life@IIMB Part-IV

A year older, a thousand years younger…

Okie… after much pestering from someone special, here is the blog about my Birthday@IIMB.

Hmmm.. I have always been somewhat indulgent when it comes to assessing the capabilities of my grey cells (I still do).. and it was such a stupid confidence which made me believe that I can do something really bold and brainy… and that was to escape the ceremonial hooshing on my birthday.

I admit I was scared… after witnessing the merciless way in which others were hooshed on their birthdays. And by some stroke of (bad?) luck, I realized that birthdays can indeed be deleted from the server and I did that, congratulating myself on a job well done. No birthday… no hooshes!!

Ahem, ahem, word did leak out and I got hooshed all right, albeit two days after my birthday… and somewhat more than required.. (Junta being angry at me for what I did) :(… And, as it became known to me that they wouldn’t really have hooshed me had I been good and honest, I felt really stupid and like an idiot.

So, I had to nurse my bottom for the whole of the following week and had to curse my stars for having given me that brilliant idea. But, luckily I was spared the customary pole dance (perhaps, because of my seedha baccha-type looks) and was also not made the target of egg-bombs.

So, the take-aways? Hmm.. small things such as this tell you a lot about the people around you.. about how much they care for you, how much they love you… and today, when I look back at these small incidents… I feel grateful that those many kicks landed on my bottom… for today, I have some of the nicest people I know as my friends…

As I always say… Life is full of pleasant surprises… :)

Now as a bonus to this blog, I am adding some clips and also the birthday mail that was sent out to all students before my grand hooshing… it also showers generous praise on me, so that’s another incentive… :D

*wicked-I-am-so-brilliant-smile*

“Hey IIM B,

What do you do to people who do not declare these B'Day for the fear of being hooshed?? You catch them and hoosh them the hardest possible!!!

We meet at L^2 tonight for the very same reason, to "celebrate" the BDay of a certain Mr. Patwari whose Bday was a couple of days back but the batch-mates discovered it today. So now its revenge time...PGP 2's invited to take out all their exam time frustration.

"Are mujhe last bench par baitha diya. kaise samjega hum lectures?"

"CA mein mera bahut kharab rank aaya tha!" (AIR 39 *^%**%)

"Kitna aata use karte hain roti mein, chhee!"

"kaisa khana hai yaar, chhee!"

"kitne machhar hai yahan ki library mein!"

"Bahut kharab marks aaye hai. sab mere se aaage honge!" (to a guy scoring 72, after himself scoring 87 in BGS)

Crib, crib, crib and a bit more crib!

And thus was born Cribbesh, the fraud CA, the half auditor, the super-sincere stud of Sec D.

A born fighter, he has buried himself into books right from the first week. In fact, he once seriously considered changing his room from K block to C block!

Reason - to quote the great man -

"I want to save the 15 minutes I spend everyday walking to class and mess, yaar. Can put more fight"

In fact the only reason he is still in his old room is the proximity to the loo, which incidentally he is in love with. In fact he spends more time in the loo, rather than in his room.

Talk about girls and the guy blushes big time. Further, given his devotion to studies and globe, we assumed that the fraud bong, would never be interested in the fairer sex. We were duly proven wrong when Cribbesh confessed to holding a torch and a lot more for ******** (Censored). Tribute must be paid to the bugger, who actually had ******* (Censored again) … Nah … the hero got the all India 39th rank ("woh to consolation prize tha, yaar"). By the way, the girl does not know that his aashique has gotten into IIMB!! Height of modesty!!

Yogesh is angry at you, he is furious and it shows on his face. He is about to open his mouth and you stand there waiting for the choicest of abuses to be hurled at you. And what actually comes out?? - "Chor", "Nalayak". Yeah, these are the most abusive words in Yogesh's vocabulary. Unbelievable for a 22 years old guy? But then, our Yogesh is one of his kind!

However, with his intelligence, simplicity and straightforwardness, he is sure to win many hearts in his two years here! Any statistical estimates as to how many of them will be female hearts??? Our calculations show a 99% confidence interval!!

Wishing this wonderful person a very happy, though belated, birthday.

Credits: Sec D Back Benchers Club”

~Snapshots 2~

A few more glimpses of life@IIMB

2nd term was relatively a chiller affair... .. 'Coorg Trip' with the Section D-ites...












That's Pabbo Studdari... and me







Catching an occasional nap in class - trying to lure the ever-elusive sleep..

Birthday Celebrations at L^2...














Diwali celebrations... on campus!











Suit boot and photography!

That's my room, by the way

… and thus ended the worst year of my life

The year 2006 ended with the usual revelry that one would expect on a new year’s eve… and as usual, I was locked up in my room, biding time, trying to ignore the loud music blaring outside and reflecting on the year gone by.

Now, am not really the philosophical type. So, while I always stay away from parties (even on new year’s eve), I don’t usually take stock of all the happenings in my life at year-end.

But this year was different. It was.

It gave me some moments that I will cherish all my life… it gave me some that I just want to forget… forget that they ever happened… believe that something like that would never happen.

Some loss may be transient, something which loses its importance over time and thus, the loss by itself doesn’t hurt you much. What hurts is the ignominy associated with it… But when you lose something which cannot be replaced, something which was very important to you, something which you had always taken for granted, something which had become a part of the way you lived… it hurts and it hurts more than you can take…

The good thing about life is that it keeps moving forward. So you move ahead with time and forget all that’s given you joy in the past, all that you’ve hated… all that which made you, all that which broke you… and when you actually sit down someday to relive it all, you realize how much you have learnt, how much you have grown, what you have gained and what you have lost. It is in such moments of introspection that you have an unbiased view of the world around you, the world inside you and you simultaneously feel proud of yourself for everything you have done that is good and hate yourself for everything that is bad…

Anyways… 2006.. good riddance!